To Take A Dare Essay, Research Paper
October 06. 1999
What an first-class manner to get down off meitnerium 13th birthday, my Canis familiaris got ran over by a auto! To do it better it was my ain female parent that did it. He was my lone true friend, the lone 1 that I truly loved and cared for, and now he is dead.
I hate my over-weight, hard-ball of a female parent! It was her mistake, all her mistake! I don & # 8217 ; t fault her for non allowing me have any friends over, she to ashamed of herself! And, I hate to state this but I am ashamed of her to. If people truly knew what she was like, they would be ashamed excessively. She knew the lone existent friend I of all time had was my cunning small Canis familiaris Marshall, and so she turns about and killed him! I HATE HER! I HATE HER! ! ! How could she be so careless, how could hold she non seen him, he isn & # 8217 ; t that little.
I don & # 8217 ; t cognize what I & # 8217 ; m traveling to make without Marshall. How will I of all time acquire along. ? ? I & # 8217 ; ll surely miss waking up every forenoon, and seeing him standing on his hind legs at the pes of my bed, with his forepart paws braced against the side, starring at me with his large brown eyes. I can retrieve that his stubby tail would beat back and Forth, and he lean his caput over and cream my face and cervix, with his warm rough lash. Boy did I love that Canis familiaris, I & # 8217 ; m traveling to lose him so much. I & # 8217 ; ll ne’er happen a friend rather like him, he is unreplaceable.
Marshall didn & # 8217 ; t care about the manner that I looked, whether or non I was smart or stupid, or even about the cats that I messed around with, ( which is why my ape of a male parent resents me. ) He ne’er one time put me down like everyone else. He loved me, and now he & # 8217 ; s gone, and it & # 8217 ; s all because of my female parent! !
I & # 8217 ; m traveling to lose Marshall, but I know that I will ne’er see him once more, thanks to my selfish female parent who let him run loose while I was at school. She knew how much he loved to trail auto. He ever did make it, of all time since he was a small puppy. But of class she didn & # 8217 ; t attention. I & # 8217 ; m ne’er traveling to forgive her for this, NEVER! !
October 08th 1999
I no longer care what I do, my ain male parent calls me a sl** , so why shouldn & # 8217 ; t I live up to his accusals? ? Merely last dark, I went out and did precisely what he expected me to make. I & # 8217 ; m sick of him naming me a sl** , and everything else in the book, when I barely even does anything. I hope that he & # 8217 ; s happy now, that I gotten into drugs and I & # 8217 ; m seeking to submerge out my jobs in liquor, that should do him truly proud.
Oh, sometimes I wish that I was dead, so all my jobs go off, and I could be myself and following get lectured on it. It non like anyone would care anyway.. Mom is excessively captive in her ain selfishness, and Dad, he & # 8217 ; s merely off in his ain small universe. The both of them don & # 8217 ; t even know that I & # 8217 ; m alive, except when it come clip to bi*** at me for something that I did. Cipher cares for me except for a few imbeciles that merely desire one thing sex!
Sometimes I even wonder, why should I even care. It & # 8217 ; s non like I & # 8217 ; m traveling to be anything when I grows up. My school classs are falling and I & # 8217 ; m about positive that I will hold to take the class 7 over once more. That & # 8217 ; s traveling to be merriment,
that will do Dad even more happy with his small miss.
I merely wear & # 8217 ; t cognize what to make! Cipher cares about me so why should I! !
October 10th 1999
My house has turned into a was zone! ! Ever since my 13th birthday, nil has been the same. Whenever I return place from someplace, Mom barricades herself in her bed room, and Dad prepares an onslaught. We ne’er avoid each other & # 8217 ; s district, because that would intend triumph for Te other. Our regular modus operandi is fliping a few verbal bombs at each other when our waies cross, and all this contending ends with them labeling me as a sl** , and me naming them the worse parents!
I & # 8217 ; m ill and tired of all this, I think the best manner out is for me to either to run off from this topographic point, or take my away life and do everyone happy! It seems like the lone logic manner out of things!
October 12th 1999
What a wicked party last dark! ! It was so much merriment, there was nil large that happened, merely the same old material, drugs, liquor and you know what! ! The cats that were there were all over me, they seemed reasonably happy when they all got what they wanted. I mush have slept with three cats last dark.
God, why do I hold to be this manner, why can & # 8217 ; t I be like all the other misss, and acquire nice cats that what a relationship, non merely sex? ? I can & # 8217 ; t do anything right, I wish everything was different! !
October 16th 1999
You ne’er think what happened to me? It merely made my life so much better, I merely received a call from the infirmary, and they told me that I am infected with the HIV virus. It all started with the first cat that I slept with Jamie Thomson. It merely happened one time, but so I kept making it, more and more, except with everyone else. Nothing should do a difference to me cognize. Why shouldn & # 8217 ; t I live up to all the names that my male parent calls me! I went to the infirmary on Saturday, with my fellow Jesse, he came to give me moral support. We were both truly scared, so I made up a false age and name It & # 8217 ; s non that difficult to make this, because I look much older than I truly am. I truly fooled the physicians when I said that I was Amy Jefferson, age 18!
How could I have let myself & # 8230 ; . or allow me father have so much control over my ideas and actions. It & # 8217 ; s all his mistake! ! I hate him, I & # 8217 ; m traveling to decease because of him. I wish he would hold this cursive disease, non me. I & # 8217 ; m merely 13, I don & # 8217 ; t want to decease. It & # 8217 ; s traveling to be so awkward holding to phone all those cats, explicating to them that I have HIV & # 8217 ; s and that they should travel acquire tested. It is mine every bit good if I was dead! ! I & # 8217 ; m traveling to decease anyhow! ! That & # 8217 ; s it! I & # 8217 ; m traveling to acquire this over and done with now. ! ! I & # 8217 ; m traveling to make it tonight, and I & # 8217 ; ll do it look like nil happened. I & # 8217 ; ll do it look like I ran off, when truly I & # 8217 ; m on he underside of some drop out side of town. They likely won & # 8217 ; t even know that I & # 8217 ; m losing, until person discoveries my organic structure. I hate my life all the hating is traveling to stop tonight! !
Lost, and confused